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had a good sleep though. woke up and got the urge to get the games thing done. did the stands and all and realise i can just use the cones. and the best thing? spent like 3 hrs to paint the flag and all on the thrash bag. and the paint cracked. talk about effort. gonna get coloured cloth this book out. end of the day felt like i did nothing. life doesnt always go our way. if it did, none of us will have to work for it. but at times no matter how much you give u just cant get it right. thats life. aint it. reflections. thinking of what went by my now 22nd year. dint achieve much i guess. friends. plenty of them. true friends. prob a handful. family. been thru times where one wont imagine seeing the state that it is now in. one wont know how to appreciate till youve lost it all. or at least almost. imagine not having a place to call home. and sharing a room with your parents. and being able to see your dad like once a month. thats why now i appreciate simple things. of just having a meal with my parents. never take things for granted. for you wont know when you will lose them all. going into the 2nd quarter of my life. that is if i leave this place at eighty. time where i should start working for my future. and planning for it. to be responsible for oneself. to be able to look after oneself. and be able to fend for oneself. scary aint it. decisions decisions. i believe God has it all planned for us. its just whether we could see the light and whether we would follow. pray. they say. and He will answer. i believe for he has answered. not once not twice. and he has done amazing things in my life to what i am today. to what i have today. friends family mag. how true can that be. no doubt i have back slided but deep down i still believe. i come to realised that in life if things dont go our way, dont blame Him, for his has greater plans ahead. all we need to do is simply to believe. simple it may sound but how difficult it is to be done. hmmm. dunno whats gotten into me. writing all this. oh well. mag's at hoobastank concert at sentosa. free tix. ha. she even call me to let me hear the concert. all i could hear was just noise from the background. ha. its the thought that counts. 6 more weeks. hopefully i can leave in peace. ha. that everything will be handed down well and whatever knowledge and experience i have i will have passed them down. i hope. they say when you are about to ord just heck it. hmmm. somehow i just cant. maybe influence my orange cloth. or ben. ha. not that i cant let it go. trust me i cant wait to leave. just that i could leave with everything in order and in confidence that all will be good and even better. can see the dedication in the three of them though they are still learning. somehow i feel that the way they work compliments each other. ha. lucky of orange cloth, myself, and the coy to have them and not anyone else posted into our coy. hopefully their zest and commitment dont burn out. i know they wont. not a very good thing to have too much time in hand with nothing to do. one tends to think. and reflect. sigh. all the people i have offended along the way. the mistakes i made. if only i knew. if only. over the mountains and the seas your river runs with love for me and i could open up my heart and let the healer set me free am happy to be in the truth and i will gladly lift my hands for i will always sing of when your love came down i could sing of your love forever. stay humble. stay true. to yourself. to God. desmond scribbled at 9:30 PM. | |
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